The Horizon Line

The Long Lost Blog: Bill the Surgeon

2010-01-31T22:57:00.000+10:00

EXPLANATION: I discovered a blog post I never posted from about 2 yrs ago! I borrowed Mikey's awesome USB stick. So this is what happens when you lend me stuff.

Novelty pens annoy me. You know the ones shaped like a cucumber or Mickey Mouse or one that has a maze where you have to get a tiny ball through . Actually the last one's pretty fun, but generally, all novelty pens should be burned.

But I've discovered that the same principle does not apply to novelty USB sticks. Mikey lent me his SEVOrane surgeon USB so I could watch 'Forgetting Sarah Marshall' (which has way too many nude scenes btw...though I really don't know whether they were supposed to appeal to guys or girls...no really. I'm disturbed.)

And I've also discovered that exam prep really is not that fun (although this particular journey of discovery has been ongoing since year 6).

Also also discovered that novelty surgeon USB sticks are a pretty fun way to procrastinate (it's still like a 2 on a fun scale, but compared to exam prep which is not even on the scale, it wins.)
So I've created a short story about Bill the Surgeon. Wow. I named an inanimate object.

It's called

SURGEONS MAY EARN LOTS OF MONEY AND WEAR COOL LOOKING GREEN CLOTHES, BUT THEYARE JUST LIKE NORMAL, LESS FORTUNATE, BUT NEVERTHELESS NORMAL PEOPLE.

THEY TYPE.

THEY WRITE UNNECESSARY SHOPPING LISTS.

THEY CHECK THEMSELVES OUT IN REFLECTIVE SURFACES.

THEY LISTEN TO BEYONCE.

THEY GET ELECTROCUTED WHEN PULLING OUT PLUGS WITH WET HANDS.

The end.

TOP 5 MOMENTS IN PERTH

2009-12-09T21:56:00.001+10:00

If I attempt a recap, it would never come up to the standards of Sime, especially since I wasn't there half the time. So instead I'm going to do a countdown.

TOP 5 MOMENTS IN PERTH

5. BRINGING AYC TO KINGS PARK
Hilarity: 5
Absurdity: 4
Niceonezity 5

This day would have scored higher if it wasn't so DAM COLD.
Still, a day that ends with 90s karoke in AJTan's car is fine by me!

4. CAN READ MY, CAN READ MY POKER FACE
Hilarity: 7
Absurdity: 6
Niceonezity: 7

Nate was the instigator of this one. I think he was just itching to play something other than 'mmmchchmmmchtookatookatookatookadonkadonka' (or as Song thinks -tonkatonka. Oh, er, um, NO. WRONG.) So anyway, I was going REALLY WELL. With Sime as my inner voice, he really put off my opponents

NESS

(shows Sime a 2 and 6)

SIME

WOW NESS. JUST WOW. YOU'RE GOING TO WIN IT! ALL IN! ALL IN!!!!!

NESS

Er, really? Do you think that's a good ide...

SIME

NESS. I'M TELLING YOU. JUST WOW. YOU COULD BEAT ANYONE WITH THOSE CARDS.

Ness wins that round.

Next round...

NESS

(shows Sime double ace)

SIME

WOW NESS. JUST WOW. YOU'RE GOING TO WIN IT! ALL IN! ALL IN!!!!!

NESS
Er, really? Do you think that's a good ide...

SIME

NESS. I'M TELLING YOU. JUST WOW. YOU COULD BEAT ANYONE WITH THOSE CARDS.

You see. We bluffed TOGETHER. And as soon as he left to "spy" on Nathan, my days were over. I lost so badly I still cry at night.
That night also bore one the greatest lines of camp:

NATE

I use 'dangerously straight' shampoo

TIM

Shampoo can't make you straight Nathan.

3. WET PANTS DAY

Hilarity: 6
Absurdity: 2
Niceonezity: 8

Wet pants day - where everyone listened to KFang and got their pants wet. KFang's advice consisted of 'CATAMARAN + WATER = NO SWIMMERS NECESSARY'

And since I am a non-boater, or non-water person in general, I listened to KFang...and got my pants wet.

Being with the dream team (Song and KC) was also hilarious because it took us the 16th turn to realise we didn't actually have to let the sail SWING to the other side of the boat when we turn, but if we hold it, near-death experiences were avoided. We also christened our boat 'THE HOTTIE'. No reason really. But it does add 2 absurdity points to the day. Score.
Half the aloe vera green goo was used that day too. Score!

2. WHAT NOT TO WEAR BY ~~TRINNY AND SUSSANAH~~ EMP AND KFANG
Hilarity: 8
Absurdity: 10
Niceonezity: 9

Friday night was SO RANDOM. KFang said one little comment (which I now can't remember, something about my burnt forehead) which started a whole 4 hour discussion on how to compliment the opposite sex and WHAT NOT TO WEAR. Take note ladies, and especially gentlemen, here is an abridged version of that list (remember, this is according to the opp. sex, so really, now we know the guys know nothing about fashion):

GUYS SHOULD BURN THE FOLLOWING:
- V-neck T-shirts (with chest hair)
- white socks with black shoes and pants (COUGH COUGH)
- boardies as everyday wear
- short sleeved business shirts
- rude cartoon/writing shirts
- their lifetime supply of hairgel

GIRLS SHOULD FOLD UP NICELY AT THE BACK OF THEIR CLOSET THE FOLLOWING:
- flared jeans
- overalls
- skanky anything
- really bright colours
- glittery things except on Max (phew, close one)
- platform wedges
- knee high boots, esp. slouchy types
- dresses that don't skim waist (the pregnant ones, even though they're REALLY comfortable)

AND THE FOLLOWING GOES FOR EVERYONE:
- crocs
- g-strings
- too much makeup

1. I'LD RATHER BE WHITE FACE THAN DOUBLE RED FACE
Hilarity: 7
Absurdity: 6
Niceonezity: 10

On Saturday, we went to a beach (no I can't remember the name of it, this is what happens when I have no responsiblities) and it was PURE BLISS. I overloaded on sunscreen because that is what Ruldoph the red nosed reindeer would do, and sat in the shade of a tree lording over the burning pieces of human meat on the sand.
Water was GREAT.
Fish and chips + icypole was GREAT.
Pride & prejudice audio book was GREAT.
Sticking sticks in between my delicate toes was NOT.

All in all, a very blessed holiday. Perth water should still drown in itself though.

P.S. Photo uploading is not going well. Expect them on Facebook in the next 20 years. Thanks.

2009: The Year of the New Shoe

2009-11-17T10:46:00.000+10:00

The other day I realised I've accumulated quite a number of new shoes over the past two months. Some are from Singapore and Malaysia and some are from my favourite shoe shop - Tony Bianco. Shoes from there are just incredibly comfortable, which is always my first priority.

The purple ones in the middle I couldn't actually try on beforehand. Never again. THEY HURT SO MUCH. Whoever made those shoes HATE FEET and want to see them die (quote Monica).

YET I LOVE THEM ALL. Is it possible to marry inanimate objects?

This is how you do it.

2009-11-15T00:40:00.001+10:00

Kev shows us the perks of arriving before everyone else does. Vonnie gives her thumb of approval. Queensland Government would obviously never hire either of them to be a driving examiner.

I've decided to become more diligent in my blooging (blooging? sorry, I mean blogging). The year has gone by super fast and it's pretty much a blur of stressfunstressfunstressfun...AND I CAN'T REMEMBER ANYTHING. Oh yeah, I remember something!...oh wait, it's gone.

Yeah, still not there.

This is like trying to remember my prayer point on Monday. I should really write these things down.

Anyway, what was I writing down? Oh yeah, becoming more diligent in blogging. Yes, this is so I actually have a record of me doing interesting things and not just sitting in a chair all year which is seriously what I'm thinking I've done all year. I may have got up to go to uni once or twice. I'm really not sure. Which is why I should blog. Which segways into my rhetorical question of the day: What do you think of my new ugly blog template.
I was looking at templates, the world exploded and I ended up with this on my screen.

Anyway, Sunday School Sunday is tomorrow (or should I say today?) so I should sleep.
Oh, FUNNY STORY. Frank and I were putting up the sign and Nathan was there to hand us letters. The following conversation ensued:

NATHAN

Why are there two Sundays?

NESS

Don't answer him Frank. Let's see how long it takes him to get it.

NATHAN

No really guys, why are there two Sundays?

FRANK

Think about it...

NATHAN

Thinks.

No really guys, why are there two Sundays?

NESS

Okay, tomorrow is celebrating Sunday School right?

NATHAN

Yeah. But really, why are there two Sundays?

NESS

And tomorrow's what day?

NATHAN

Sunday...Sunday School...two Sundays...OHHHHH.

Walks off.

FRANK

That was funny.

It's over.

2009-07-10T21:27:00.000+10:00

So my week of holidays is done already. It was shorter than Wrinkle's tail. Boo.
Oh well, it was fun while it lasted, went to Melbourne for a few days. I've shopped and drunk enough tea and hot chocolate to last a lifetime.

Mum and I were not so secretly afraid of catching swine flu. When a guy sat behind us on the tram and started coughing (and not just a dry cough, it was full of phlegm and other mucus-y sounds), Mum held her scarf up to her nose while I tried to hold my breath for 40 minutes. But in the end victory was ours! We didn't get sick and can now gleefully roll around in our purchases.

But during the fun of holidays, Mum felt the need of reminding me what a grumpy bum I was during exam time. And I don't blame her. I am a grumpy bum. Like, I am the grumpiest bumiest grumpy bum there is.

I don't go out. I sit in my chair staring at the computer screen for 6 hours straight until I have to pee. I'm angry and sulky and stressed. Basically for 2 weeks, I hate life.

Some people just do not get stressed like this. They can breeze through exam time. Maybe because they actually study during semester *shifty eyes*. So for those who just don't get how severe my grumpy buminess can get, here are some visual aids:

(I'm in blue. Since I'm an arteest and attend to the details, I've drawn myself with unkempt hair and wearing the smelly pajamas I wore for a week straight.)

Don't hate me cuz I'm multitalented

2009-04-28T15:56:00.000+10:00

So Frank recently blogged about how to draw a photo of Viv.
The end product was this -

I knew the inner artist inside me could do a waaaay better job than the above. Pfft...I could do it blindfolded using my foot.

I also used Viv as an example -

what you need:

paper

pencil

no rubber needed because I'm that good

1. trace the outline. (i cheated by using a coaster because everyone knows a person's face is a perfect circle)

2. colour the hair completely black.

3. don't worry about highlights. highlights are for amatuers and all experts know hair doesn't reflect light.

4. eyes are the easiest. just draw two black dots and you're done.

5. draw the outline of teeth because everyone loves teeth. the more the better I say.

6. for an abstract, modern feel to the drawing, shade wherever you feel like.

7. don't fix up anything. mistakes make thee arteest.

Me: hey everyone do you know who this is? *shows viv's picture*

Everyone: yes.

Day in a life of a Med Student Episode 1

2009-02-05T12:00:00.000+10:00

6:45am
w;lkjd,mdioc…

6:46am
Okay, was not obviously awake enough one minute ago. Hmm, now picking out what to wear. Well, it has to go with my dirty old sneakers as I have a cadaver lab today…so…jeans and a T-shirt it is. How original.

7:00am
Yeah it took me 14 minutes to dress myself, wad up. Now making my lunch as I make my breakfast as I look at my timetable while I watch Sunrise. Toast with vegemite for breakfast…and bread with vegemite for lunch! Yay, who says variety is the spice of life? Monotony all the way baby.

7:40am
Lecture notes? Check. Keys? Check. Water bottle? Check. ID and access key, purse, memory stick, sunglasses, Blistex, notebook, lab coat, pens? Check. Bag big enough to fit Mount Everest? Check.

7:45am
Walking in hot sun. Waiting at traffic lights for 5 million light years. Walking again in hot sun. Seeing med students from everywhere going to GH1. Yes we’re overtaking Southport.

8:00am
Ahh, finally in air-conditioned lecture room. Mmm…

8:05am
Freezing my ass off.

9:30am
Scary how little anatomy I’ve retained from year one.

11:00am
FINALLY. I’M STARVING.

11:30am
Outside anatomy lab. Griffith is very proud of its lab because most uni labs are in a basement somewhere smelling of feet. Griffith’s is on the 6th floor and people have sworn they’ve seen whales swimming in the distant ocean.

11:35am
Get my first look and touch of a cadaver. Some people have a problem with faces, some have a problem with toes. To be honest, I was fine with it all (except the eyelashes, they were a bit creepy). Got to feel a heart in my hand and see everything that I’ve only ever seen in a textbook. Less colour I suppose, but definitely more real. Obviously.

12:55pm
Washing my hands with hot water. Seemed to have dried up my hands to resemble two mutant pieces of chalk.

1:00pm
In PBL room for first case study. I sneeze and people look very shocked for some reason.

1:05pm
Yes! I’m not on food duty until next month (every PBL, someone brings some snacks to whittle away the long hours). I’m pretty sure people will not be impressed with my vegemite sandwich fingers.

4:00pm
In the Learning Centre typing up my PBL LIs (Learning Issues). A very tedious part of the Med course.

4:10pm
Whyyyyy…I seemed to have picked a computer where its H key doesn’t work. Something very frustrating when my topic is “DIARRHOEA”.

5:30pm
Sent my LIs with the title “Diarroea, Colera and Fluid Omeostasis”.
My group probably now thinks I have a phobia of H’s.

6:00pm
Back at home, washed the dishes I ignored last night and this morning. Washed some rice and put it in the rice cooker.

6:15pm
Moped around for a bit over Federer’s loss (I’m still in a depressed state).

7:00pm
Eating in front of the TV.

7:30pm
Studying in front of the TV.

10:30pm
Watching TV in front of the TV.

11:30pm
Felt guilty and now studying at my study desk.

12:30am
Thud. That’s me conking out. Night y’all.

New Home Sweet New Home

2009-01-31T23:53:00.000+10:00

Yay, back to blogging! Thought I should update on how my first few days in my new home went.

For those who don’t know, I’ve moved down to the Gold Coast to do a Med degree. I’m living by myself in a nice apartment that Mum was so nice to buy for me.

One thing that Mum said to me before I left was “you’re going to make a few mistakes along the way, but that’s okay”.
Er, correct.

A mistake I made was not bringing floor cleaner so I improvised and used washing detergent instead.

Oh yeahhh…squeaky clean floors that smell like lemon.

I’ve forgotten other things like a desk lamp, drawer lining paper, bin and one thing I never gave a second thought to…a comb.

V for Victory! Victory at building things!

This was the day before when Frank and Mikey came to help set up my room. I was glad I had them, especially when the instructions looked like this –

This blob goes into this blob…

It’s been quite lonely these past few days. I’ve kept the TV on just for some noise. I also have no net yet but I’ve been watching my new NCIS dvd and awesome tennis games like FEDERER VS. RODDICK. Great stuff.

One thing I’ve learnt is that keeping one human alive is EXPENSIVE. I’ve never been a huge consumer but BOY do I eat and use a lot of stuff.

These 5 measly bags of stuff cost more than $100.

But another thing I’ve learnt is there’s nothing more satisfying than sinking in a bed that’s in a home I’ve set up and cleaned all day by myself. Ahh, independence, nothing like it.

Jump! For my love…

2008-12-11T12:24:00.000+10:00

Girl power jumping; (L-R) KC with nametag on face, Max, Viv, Frank, Cousin It.

So I’m back from my 11 day trip to Adelaide and Melbourne!! And for memories sake, I’ve decided to jot down parts of my holiday.

I think I wore myself out because now I’m sitting in my bedroom eyes half closed with a voice which is cross between an old man and a chainsaw. With phlegm. Mmm…

Anyway, here goes – but as I’ve said before, I’m the worst recapper ever. Look at Sime’s blog if you actually want a good one :)

Saturday 29 November

This is my depiction of the amount of stuff I use in 11 days which had to fit into a tiny carry-on suitcase. I never realised what a consumer I am…
But it was good practice for rationalising…for when I’m in a desert somewhere…and need…to…ration…

Anyway Tim’s dad came and picked up the Robertson crew. I had to wake up a 5. 5!!!!!

!!!!!!!!

When we got to the airport, Ems did a headcheck. 2 people missing. Kev and Sime. 1 minute to check in.
Not. Good.
But they turned up just in time. There’s fashionably late and then there’s Kev+Sime late :)

We finally got on Jetstar. Since I was sitting across from ATan, we talked about weights and protein shakes (jk)

Some good people (aka. Adelaide Colin) from Goodwood church came and picked us up in 2 gospel vans and drove us to Ade Traveller’s Inn. But not before Sime Sime thought we might get raped in an alleyway and gassed in the locked van (Fanny added on later that we may also get our arms eaten by a shark)

Hmm, all this emo talk - must be something in the Adelaide water.

We dumped our luggage in the hostel (hmm, we were very trusting, must be something in the Adelaide water) and then I had a sudden urge for bubble tea.

In Chinatown.

So I very slyly told Viv it was only 5 mins away (it ended up being more than 25 mins away).

But we all got our fix on beef noodle soup and pearl, which by the way WE CAN GET IN SUNNYBANK. Asian through and through.

Head check. ATan. Here. Let’s go.

The girls are grossed out by the hostel beds. I myself am very pleased with the room (it’s like a room made out of gold compared to YHA Gold Coast).

I go to Sime+Sime’s room to play cheat. It’s the worst. game. ever.
Note to self: do not play cheat with only 3 people.

Anyway, I better skip parts otherwise this recap will become the length of my packing list.

Some of us go to Rundermall…buy Havi’s…bla bla bla

Goodwood church then entrusts one of their cars with Kev from Sherwood (???) which KC, Kev Z and I naively hop into. We get lost. Play eye spy. Doesn’t last long. It’s either “something beginning with T” (tree) or “something beginning with C” (car).

Get to Goodwood. Witness last 2 mins of people mooing and squawking. Register. EMP nearly gets left behind. Some cool dude finally drives us home (anyone remember his name?) who was just being friendly :)

SLEEP.

Sunday 30 November

CHURCH.

Witness Pastor Lam and Aunty Jen sing in chinese. Classic.

Receive lunch. Which really, I should have treasured more for just being different from every other meal we received in the next 4 days.

Get to camp site and get ATTACKED BY FLIES AND DIE.
Witness Tom Tokura’s laugh for the first time. Haw haw haw

In same room as Fanny. Yay! And meet my future sis, Bec. Who my actual sis Bec has decided looks like a younger version of Jacey. SO TRUE.

Meet PATIENCE. Who is the best group ever. We somehow managed to sit at the smallest table in the dining hall even though we were 1 of the largest groups. And from then on our elbows knew each other at a more intimate level.
It was good having Bighead at the table so I could palm off my uneaten rice.
Same with ATan the eating machine. Everything left on the table ended up on his plate.
Which then ended up in his biceps.

Prayer meetings were interesting. EMP has only had one at youth, and we tend to pray silently. Chinese tend to pray out loud. I don’t think it means anything, but I just found that interesting.

Monday 1 December

Already tired. That pretty much sums up the rest of the trip. TIRED.

For morning PAW, got to test out my elite powerpoint skills. Up. Down. Up. Down. It’s tricky stuff.

The 2nd theme talk was interesting. Found the BGR talk much more in depth than what we’ve had before.
Max and I have to work on our gentle side if we’re ever to find our life partners haha…

Oh, side note. I am so not the female version of K Fang! He is the most random dude ever. He wrapped one of Rob’s hairs in cellophane and gave it to Ems as a “birthday present”. I would never do that *shifty eyes*

I also would never sleep like this *shifty eyes*

Tuesday 2 December

This day can be summed up in two words. AMAZIN GRACE.
While most groups took the time to take GOOD group photos, our group photos were pretty much us running to the next clue.

And no prize!! Participation and ‘having fun’ are for losers.
WE WANT OUR PRIZE GEORGE.

Wednesday 3 December

The whole camp takes a massive group photo. Not as good as the first one though where all the guys had to line up like they were on some weird asian Christian bachelor show.

And then I have to leave everyone! Boo…

I had fun at the airport with the Trinity guys where some ate camp food again, but the smart ones got HJs. Mmm…chicken which isn’t camp chicken…

Then I had 2 hours to wander around by myself because the flight gets delayed. Go figure.

ARRIVE IN MELBOURNE! Get swept away straight to a family dinner with my Aunty’s friends. Catch up with Bec. She was pretty tired having to deal with 3 Lees since Sunday. Yep, we’re all the same – drama queens.

Go to another friend’s house at 11:30 at night. By now I’m so tired I want to cry. (That’s my inner drama queen coming out)

Get excited by seeing all of Bec’s housemate’s NCIS DVDs. Woo hoo!

And the rest? Till next time! (Yeah, I think I’ve waffled on for long enough)

And to quote ATan holding his leg: “oww, my arm!” (???)

Back in the old days...

2008-11-28T11:26:00.000+10:00

Yesterday I got dragged along to a family lunch with Mum and my Aunty's old friends + Uncle Benny. It's actually quite amazing because they all know each other from their MYF hey days back in Malaysia. And they met up 25 years later!

They talked about what other MYFers were doing now - some are still living in Malaysia in the same house, some have 10 gazillion kids and 20 gazillion grandkids, and some have died.

This got me thinking whether our MYF group would keep in touch and reunite in 20 odd years? I mean, we don't know what will happen in the next few years. Some will get new jobs in new cities. Some will start families and some may just move on. But one thing is for sure - all of us will soon be too old to be in MYF. Boooo...

What I'm most curious of is who out of MYF will still be at EMP church in 20 years?! Maybe all of us...but probably not. But with technology today (cough...facebook) it will much easier for us all to keep in touch down the track then what is now for our parents.

And because I love procrastinating, especially when it comes to packing, I made a picture of what we all may look like when we're wrinkly and stumpy.

Yes, I know. It's awesome.

And yes, that is Frank with a beard. With a name like that, I couldn't help myself :)

AYC! AYC! AYC!

Post-exam depression syndrome

2008-11-25T22:48:00.000+10:00

So the two years are finally over.

Don't really know how to feel about it...I mean it's not like I've been stressed for 730 days (yes I needed a calculator for that) but right now I have that worried feeling in the pit of stomach. You know the feeling. The one that won't go away until exam marks are presented solidly on the computer screen.

When people ask how I went with exams, this is how it usually goes -

PERSON

So how did you go?

I think I failed.

PERSON

(laughs).

No really.

PERSON

(laughs). I'm sure you did fine. (walks away)

WHY DOES NO ONE BELIEVE ME?? I know I'm melodramatic 2/3 of the time but all I can do right now is pray to God that I did not fail. I don't have to sit supps. I don't miss out on my grad. And that I can move onto med next year.

I know people's advice is to not worry, you can't do anything about it and put your burdens (no matter how small they are) onto Jesus. I also know this is all true, but sometimes it's easier said than done!

But anyway just had to get that off my chest!

I know I'm going to have a smashing holidays. I've been seriously sleep deprived over the past month and it's seriously affected my fun level around people but it's getting better now.

I also have to lay off the tea for a few days :) It's been good too me during exam time but sometimes saying goodbye to a friend is the best thing you can do for them.

Or something like that.

Last weekend I also did a first aid course which wasn't too bad. The instructor was one of those ones who put more emphasis on 'FUN' than learning. Which is good for a course about common sense where it can get boring if not taught by the right person.

So really, it feels like my holidays have just begun. Lots to look forward to - catching up with friends, AYC, Bec's grad and hopefully mine :)

Sigh. I've seriously never been so worried about marks before! I'm usually pretty confident I do well, just not this particular exam...

And on that melodramatic note, I'm going off to watch the end of Survivor.
Have I mentioned I love Survivor?
Well I do.
I love it so much I want two shirts.
One that says "JEFF PROBST IS THE BESTEST HOBST"
And "OUTWIT, OUTLAST AND OUTPLAY THIS, REALITY SHOW HATERS".

Exam period summed up to a 'tea'

2008-11-14T22:33:00.001+10:00

Should be back blogging in a week...

And that's why I do science Part II

2008-09-12T12:35:00.000+10:00

Long time no blog, but I've finally found some time to put up some AWESOME photos from family camp. And by AWESOME I mean if this was the Land of Bad Photography.

But anyway, see if you can guess what I was trying to capture -

Nearly...

Almost...got...it...

SO MUCH CLOSE...

Woo hoo! I present the Glass Mountains...

DISCLAIMER: Ness does not take any responsibility for any crashes that may have occurred when a certain non-Asian had to stop his car in the middle of the road for Ness to be able to take this picture. Thank you Mr. Guai Lao.

And here are some other ones from a sight seeing stop on some mountain that I can't remember the name of. This is why I also don't do geography.

This looks so real. Maybe because it is...

My failed attempt at a CHU -

If you're wondering, I didn't actually get any pictures of the actual camp. But you know. I'll leave that up to the professionals.

And that's why I do science.

2008-08-20T09:58:00.000+10:00

My photography skills were tested at Vonnie's 21st birthday on Sunday.

Let's see how I went shall we?

MISSION: Capture special hug moments between speech givers and Vonnie.

MISSION: Capture a moment which Vonnie can remember forever.

MISSION: Capture the happy faces that were celebrating Vonnie's day with her!

Well, at least Kent looks happy...

So guys, how did I go?!

A Typical Sunday School Lesson

2008-08-02T22:41:00.000+10:00

Me: Good morning everyone! How was everyone's...Kevin, what's in your hand?

Kevin: Nothing.

Me: Kevin...

Kevin: A nintendo DS.

Me: Okay, well I don't want to see it again this...

Other kids: Cool! A DS! They're soooo much better than PS2. No they're not. Yes they are. No they're not. Yes they are. Etc.

Me: Pat your head! Rub your tummy! Do both at the same time! Put your finger to your lips! Don't move your lips!

Derek: I can still move my lips! Look! Mwa mwa mwa mwa...

Other kids: Me too! Mwa mwa mwa mwa...

Me: Okay everyone, that's enough. Let's mark the roll. Lucy?

Lucy: Here!

Me: Ricky?

Ricky: Here Miss Vanessa.

Me: Chloe?

Chloe: Here Nessy.

Me: Derek?

no answer.

Me: Derek? Derek, you're here!

Derek: I'm not Derek. I'm Scott!

Me: Okay, Scott?

Derek: I'm not here Vanesee! hehehe

several hours later...

Me: Okay today we're looking at Acts chapter 1 verse 1,

Mike: Yes, one verse!

Me: to 26.

Kids: awwww....

Me: Now who can tell me who this book was addressed to?

Derek: Brendan Nelson bashed Kevin Rudd yesterday.

Me: Yes, no, wait, Derek. We're not talking about Kevin Rudd...

Derek: We're talking about Brendan Nelson.

Chloe: Do you even know who Brendan Nelson is?

Derek: I know! And I know him betterer than you do!

Mike: Look! I'm jumping on the filing cabinet!

Me: Mike, get off the filing cabinet. Issac and Nathan, if you don't stop talking I'm going to have to separate you. Chloe and Derek. We are not talking about Brendan Nelson. Yes Jasmine?

Jasmine: Theophilus.

Me: What? Oh yeah. Right, the book was addressed to Theophilus, very good! Here's a chocolate.

Derek: Wait what? There's chocolate! You didn't tell me that! How do I get a chocolate?

Me: I'm only giving them to the people who behave or answer a question correctly. Yes Chloe?

Chloe: Paul was Saul.

Me: Uh, yes. That's correct.

silence.

Chloe: Do I get a chocolate?

several minutes later...

Me: ...and so the diciples were told to go to Judea, Samaria and where?

Kids: To the ends of the earth!

Me: Very good. Now we're going to play a game...

UTTER CHAOS FOR 10 MINUTES.

Me: If everyone isn't quiet, no one can play the game.

Mike: Yayyyy!!!!

Me: No, not yay Mike. It's a really fun game. (feels tug on end of jumper). Yes Ricky?

Ricky: Miss, I really need to go to the toilet. I've been trying to hold but I can't any longer...

Me: Yes go, no run. Nathan, what's wrong?

Other kids: Gah, he's always sulking. Stop sulking..

Me: Shhh. What's wrong?

Nathan: (angry lines coming off head). I CAN'T SEE THE BOARD!

Me: You don't have to see the board. We're playing a game now.

Nathan: (angry lines dissipating) Oh. Okay.

Several minutes later...

Me: Okay, let's have three prayer points for closing prayer. Yes Mei?

Mei: More rain!

Me: Okay that's good.

Misha: More water!

Ryan: The dams! The dams! THE DAMS! WE'RE GOING TO DIE WITHOUT THE DAMS!

Derek: Brendan Nelson. I think he's depressed.

Me: Okay, something not water related. And no Derek, nothing to do with Brendan Nelson.

Chloe: I want to pray for this boy at youth. You guys wouldn't know him because you don't go, but anyway, he's my friend. So yeah. I go to youth.

Me: Um, okay, maybe you can pray for him at home in your individual prayer, but something for now.

Mei: The pandas.

Me: Okay, I'll take that. Let's say endangered species. And one more...

Kevin: My Nintendo DS.

Me: Individual prayer Kevin, individual prayer. Derek, come back, sit back in your seat. It's not time to go...yes Jasmine?

Jasmine: That we have the strength to tell our friends about Jesus.

Me: What? Oh yeah, that's a great prayer point Jasmine. Okay, who's going to do closing prayer. No Mei, we're let someone else do it. No Derek, last time you prayed in double dutch. Okay, Issac you can do it. Everyone, bow your heads, close your eyes and put your hands together. Kevin, put your hands together, not around your DS. Okay, you can start now Issac.

Issac: Dear Heavenly Father Oh Lord Jesus Man, thank you for water, but please give us more. And let the small populating animal species not die so we have more food to eat. And the thing that Jasmine said. In Jesus' Almighty Holy Moly name, Amen.

Kids: Amen.

And Amen to that! I thank the Lord for the opportunity to teach all these wonderful kids about God...and for giving me such amusing lessons every Sunday!

Peace out.

What is Wrong with this Picture?

2008-07-31T18:34:00.000+10:00

Let me give you a clue.

Go Griffith.

And to quote Usher: YEAH YEAH YEAH!

2008-07-13T20:46:00.000+10:00

I'm on holidays! YEA-YAH! O-KAAAY!

So where have I been? Well obviously not on my blog. But I plan to reminisce on the past two months over a few blogs, because really, it is worth reminiscing! I spent exam period drawing angry faces on my calendar, one week memorising every dance move in the fundraising concert, three weeks fending for myself and the furry lump when Mother was away, negative one week not being at camp :( , two weeks in a hellhole and every Sunday telling Mike to get off the filing cabinet.

But for now, here is a short story that Max and I made up one Saturday for stress relief on Timmey's laptop...WITH A BUILT IN WEB CAM!

And if you're wondering, no, it doesn't even make sense to me.

Girl Power's Adventure to the Sea

Once upon a time there were four girls. But Vivian was getting her hair done by Nathaniel...

So once upon a time there were three girls, who went on a trip to the sea.

They decided to scuba dive into the sea and they found treasure.
Christmas treasure.
Christmas CHRISTIAN treasure!

Once they found it they were really excited...but then Mikey's pirate ship came across their boat and killed them!

The End

Updating in 3 days...

2008-07-10T10:33:00.000+10:00

If I had achondroplasia, I would be this guy:

The To-Do List

2008-04-03T23:32:00.000+10:00

LAMENT! I wish I had more time to update, but with so many things to do and so little time...sadly no.

Much studying to do as well, which means much sitting around staring at the wall.

But I found this hilarious clip on YouTube done by a very funny duo-Barats and Bereta. Their clip Mother's Day is still one of the most watched videos, except for that crazy-dancing-orange-Crush-T-shirtwearing dude who's got like A BILLION views.

Anyway, to emulate Frank, here's the To-Do List.

Description:

GOOD GOLLY there's a lot to accomplish today!

The actor in this one is Lee Barats, Luke's little brother. And yes, his face is stuck like that.*
As with all of our videos, parents may want to use discretion.
Music: "The Birds and the Bees" by Patrick & Eugene

*No, his face is not really stuck like that.

I won't stain it.

2008-03-27T17:29:00.000+10:00

That's a quote from my sister who immediately went out to Macca's and stained it. It being a white t-shirt. The stain being coffee.

DON'T YOU KNOW THE RULE?

Wearing white shirts is like a magnet towards black and brown liquids!

It's like bees and pollen.

It's like dogs and raw meat.

It's like Bui and a microphone.

But anyway, here's a late update on the Easter Monday trip to Burleigh Heads. In a montage! Woooooh!

KENT: Okay guys. Here's the plan. The order is me, Jack Jack Jacky (The one Jacky, not three), KC, Vonnie, Chris and lastly PCDawg + Girlpower. Everyone goes at exactly 0900 hours. Protect each other. Kill the enemy. No one is left behind. Once we get onto the highway, make a bird formation. A BIRD FORMATION.

SONG: Chill brotha.

KENT: I WILL NOT CHILL. Instead I will twiddle my thumbs to heighten my excitement for today.

BUI: Heyyyyyyy. That's my thang.

VONNIE: GUYS! GUYS! LOOK! I HAVE A PIMPLE ON MY HEAD! WANNA SEE IT SANDIE?

SANDIE: Ew. No. I'ld rather give the camera a death stare. I think it wants to kill me.

EMS: Has everyone put on sunscreen? Is the food packed? Can everyone fit in the cars? Remember bible study everyone! Sigh. Why can't there be more Emilys in the world?

CHRIS: Where am I? Who am I? I'm confused.

EVERYONE: Girrrrrrl power!

MAX: Sam! I'm not ready! You have to say 1 2 3 before you take the photo. ALWAYS SAY 1 2 3. Say it Sam. SAY IT.

MAX: (Into walkie talkie) Okay, here's a game everyone can play over.

OTHER CARS: Silence.

MAX: I spy with my little eye, something beginning with M over.

OTHER CARS: Silence.

MAX: I repeat. I spy with my little eye, something beginning with M over.

OTHER CARS: Silence.

MAX: (To girl power) We need music.

CHRIS: I'm aussie. No really. Look at my hat.

KENT: Man I'm looking buff today. The cooking, the hat, the umbrella, I've got it goin' on today!

FRANK: Look at me gooooo! This is fun!

VONNIE: PHH. YOU ARE PITIFUL. A PITIFUL SIGHT. IF I WASN'T PLAYING AGAINST YOU I WOULD TELL YOU TO GET OUT OF MY SIGHT BUT SINCE I AM PLAYING AGAINST YOU, I WON'T TELL YOU TO GET OUT OF MY SIGHT BECAUSE OTHERWISE I WOULDN'T BE ABLE TO BEAT YOU! BEAT YOU INTO A PULP! BEAT YOU LIKE MICHAEL JACKSON WOULD. LET'S SEE WHAT YOU'VE GOT SKINNY TWIG. BRING IT!

FRANK: It's just a game Vonnie.

VONNIE: A game? A GAME! I TELL YOU...

FRANK: You're out.

VONNIE: Oh man...I was so close, I...ooh lamb chop.

PETER: What's that for?

TIM: What's what for?

PETER: The long rod thing.

TIM: To contact the aliens. Duh.

EMS: Stop staring at the camera. We have a tent to set up people! Why can't there be more Emilys in the world?

Before the hand.

HEIDI: Let's build something!
MAX: Like what? A castle? A car? A fish?
NESS: A hand?
No objection.
NESS: A hand it is.

During the hand.

SOMEONE: What is it?
GIRL POWER: IT'S A HAND.
SOMEONE ELSE: What is it?
GIRL POWER: IT'S A HAND.
SOMEONE ELSE: Oh awesome! It's a starfish!
GIRL POWER: IT'S A HAND.
SOMEONE ELSE: That's interesting.
GIRL POWER: IT'S A...oh wait, thanks.

After the hand.

SVEN: The thumb and pinky finger look the same.
GIRL POWER: (Plots Sven's death.)

I'll put up more photos on Facebook!

And here's something I found hilarious in 'Rush Hour 3':

(Detective Carter arrests fat woman)
Fat woman: I want a lawyer.
Carter: You need a personal trainer. (looks at licence) Says here you weigh 180 pounds; that's more than the damn car, girl!
Fat woman: I have a thyroid condition.
Carter: Then stop eating thyroids!

Burleigh Heads - Easter Monday 24th March 2008

All's Random that Ends Random

2008-02-16T16:00:00.000+10:00

ALIEN BURGER

Calendar that Mum got free from the chemist which I thought was quite nice until I saw that the pretty suns were actually pills.

And to quote Scrubs -

JD: Dr.Cox...

Dr.Cox: Newbie, if the next two words out of your mouth aren't 'See ya' then the third word will be 'Oh my god. My crotch. You've punched me in my crotch'.

JD: See Ya!

Which of these faces is not like the others...

2008-02-07T17:39:00.000+10:00

So these photos were taken quite a while back at youth, but as I was looking through them, I noticed that there was always one person that stood out in each photo, see whether you see what I see...

a) "I LOVE CAMERAS! LURVVVVE THEM! THEY MAKE ME SO HAPPEEEEEE!!!! Have I mentioned I love cameras?"

"And here I am again! YESSSSSSS!!!"

Answer:

b) "I hate cameras. So. much. angry. at. cameras. I hate life."

Answer:

c) "I'm pleasantly shocked at how lame this photo is. Hmm...why am I so dark compared to the others? People should call me Bui. Hey everyone, call me Bui."

Answer:

And...here's an obvious one.

In other news, I'm going to upload the CNY dances soon, just have to find a converter which can get the video down to 100MB.

And to quote John Travolta from Staying Alive, "You know what I wanna do? Strut."

What object is this?

2008-02-06T17:18:00.000+10:00

This may have no answer. I really don't know what it is. What is it??! I swept it from underneath my bed a few days ago, and I thought I better keep it in case it's important or what not. Or maybe I'm really wrong and it's actually really useless like a missing 'A' from one of those contemporary 3D art sculptures. Or again, not.

Here's another theory: I read this book when I was younger called Finders Keepers by Emily Rodda (the Delta Quest author). And it was about how things like keys, glasses and books go missing. And the reason is that there's actually another parrallel world, but when the wall between them breaks, there's a rip and all these objects get sucked into the other world, but then you find them again because there's wall security who push all the objects back and then other people sew the rips back up but our world doesn't know that AND SO this black wierd knobbly thing I found might have fallen into the other world but then it was pushed back into OUR world in the wrong place!!!!

YES! THAT'S IT! THAT'S THE ANSWER!

Mystery of the black knobbly thing? Solved.

I'M FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!

2008-02-01T17:18:00.000+10:00

I'm finally on holidays! And to celebrate, I went shopping!...by myself.

Nah! I love my own company. I'm awesome.

Anyway, since I haven't given money to anyone except crabby bus drivers for the past two weeks, I started today with the mentality of -

MUST BUY SOMETHING.

ANYTHING.

Of course, this is a very bad mentality to have, especially when sale season is over and all that remains is overpriced and not to mention, ugly.

Seriously, the fashion these days is questionable. After going into a few stores, all the clothes start to look the same. Everything is either -

a) a $60 skimpy rectangle shaped cloth,

b) a dress embellished with what looks like the world's entire supply of beads, or

c) a vest.

I actually wanted a vest at one stage, but then I saw a group of 8 tweenies walking by accompanied by 8 matching vests.

Surprisingly, I did find something, which I lurrrve! and want to wear forever. Of course, everytime I buy something new I think I want to wear it forever.

To remind myself never to buy a vest until it goes out of fashion and I can make some kind of "yeah I'm wearing a vest. what up." kind of statement, I've posted the below picture.

Yeah, so it's not exactly a vest, but it could well end up looking that bad.

NB. If you're not cringing, and actually hiding an embarrassed smile at this moment because you actually like the above outfit, here's where you can get it. :)

SHAME ON YOU.

Just kidding.

Not.

Overheard

2008-01-22T17:39:00.000+10:00

So I was surfing the net (as you do when you're supposed to be studying) and found this site called Overheard in New York. It's a site where anyone can post up anything that they've overheard. Some of the stuff that these people hear is disturbingly funny...

Here's some of my favourite quotes:

Kid #1: Paper beats rock. BAM! Your rock is blowed up!
Kid #2: "Bam" doesn't blow up, "bam" makes it spicy. Now I got a SPICY ROCK! You can't defeat that!

--6 train

Girl: So for the last half-hour of The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants I couldn't stop crying. Then everybody in the theater turned around and laughed at me.

--Waverly & Mercer

Girl: I heard there's an Asian girl in the new Harry Potter.
Guy: Yeah.
Girl: So they are branching out.
Guy: Yeah...but she is kinda big.

--Beard Papa's, Broadway & Astor

Chick #1: Omigod, like, if I like your earrings, why should I tell someone else I like your earrings? I should just tell you.
Chick #2: Omigod, I'm just like that too. But really it's because I love getting compliments.
Chick #1: Omigod! Me, too! It's the only reason why I say nice things to other people.

--33rd & 6th

Crazy: So I had to get fillings in all of my teeth.
Passenger: Uh huh.
Crazy: But I figured, why let them do that to me after they drilled holes in my brain, ya know?
Passenger: Sure.
Crazy: But I figured, might as well! Although if they were going to fill my teeth, I'd want them to use jelly.
Passenger: Yep.
Crazy: But the guy at the counter said they were out of jelly. So I got a blueberry muffin.

--R train

Chick: Omigod, I totally want an Asian baby. Asians make the best mixers. Like vodka.

--49th & 10th

Bald white monk in orange robes: [Mumbling to himself.]
Bimbette, to friend: I guess he's, like, praying for a safe journey.
Bald white monk in orange robes: No, I'm on the phone [shows BlackBerry].

--Metro-North

Girl #1: As Shakespeare once said: "Thou shall not kill."
Girl #2: No, that would be God.

--11th & University

Customer: I'll have a twelve-inch wheat --
Deli guy: Foot-long, or half?
Customer: Um... twelve inches. Isn't that a foot?
Deli guy: Foot-long, or half?
Customer: I think you're missing something here.

--Subway, Elmsford

Stuffy white lady pushing stroller, to friend: I can't believe people are actually taking Justin Timberlake seriously these days.
Hipster crossing East: He brought sexy back! What the hell did you do?

--Central Park West

What happened on the 25th of December

2008-01-06T15:45:00.000+10:00

So I see I haven't blogged in a yonk, but that's because of assessment, relatives and the like, so here's a quick update!

Rebekah-kah and I went to the Thies for a Christmas party. The following picture of Jacky Jacky Jacky pretty much sums up how it was:

Nah, just kidding! It was heaps of fun...except for the last half an hour where Bec made us all play Memory with a pack of cards.

"Play Memory or die."

You can find the rest of the Thie party photos on my facebook in a couple of days :)

Us Tay's also held a lunch get together on Christmas day. The following two pictures were the only ones NOT of Bec. You'll see.

My contribution, the punch! Mmm...so punchy.

The feast, with everyone digging in, including our furry lump of a pet and a gazillion flies.

And to end this blog on a high note, here's a segment I call, the Bec Montage of Nothingness (where she looks like she's helping out...when really, she's not).

Bec putting on cling wrap!

Bec washing the dishes!

Bec preparing the prawns!

Bec watering the plant!

Bec juggling peaches!

Bec getting something out of the empty oven!

Bec in action!

Bec making Mum clean!

Bec entertaining the guests!

I would have taken more photos of the actual lunch...but I was hungry.

Xia jian!

The Cupboard of Useless Things

2007-12-17T09:51:00.000+10:00

So last week, the fam decided to set up the Christmas tree (and keeping with tradition, take it down sometime in July). While taking out the Christmas tree, we came across this bag of unwanted, ugly yet festive decorations.

There was all kinds of weird stuff in here, like Catholic statues of Mary, glittery bows with annoying bells attached and a spikey fake grass wreath which leaved holes in your hand when picked up.

This 'tree' was also found. It also had a glittering 'MERRY CHRISTMAS!' on top which was quite disturbing.

I dunno, this may be some people's taste, but I personally thinks it looks like someone had a love affair with a bottle of silver spray paint. Bleh...

I also found this wierd twirly tinsel which I decorated the fruit bowl with.

Finding the bag set off a whole cleaning spree of what I now call, 'The Cupboard of Useless Things'. I think every household has one of these, where all the "Uhh...thanks..." gifts, "Wow...this is a waste of space" nic nacs and mouldy mothballs seem to congregate.

This is Mother hard at work while Bec attacks her shoulder with a not-so-cuddley beaky stuffed toy we found.

No idea what this is for. Maybe for giants?

Hmm...cause we all need one of these -

And these pair of glasses gave Bec about 10 whole seconds of amusement.

And thoughout this whole cleaning process, I was about as useful as the furry lump I'm patting.

Merry Christmas!

The Eclipse

2007-11-27T18:47:00.000+10:00

Last night at BS, Sime made an appearance before flying off to Egypt (JEALOUS!). Apart from confusing everyone with his new catchphrase taken from National Bingo Night, he had an intriguing talent of blocking every light he stands under with his ginormous head.

Hence the following.

Beach Princesses

2007-11-26T11:44:00.000+10:00

Yesterday, most of the youth went on a beach trip to Coloundra, but before that, we had to wait around church until Adult Sunday School was finished. I took this as an opportunity to annoy Max by spinning the mic stand around screaming,

WHEEL!

OF!

FORTUNEEEEE!!!

She was unamused.

We then all met up at Kent's house with Frank, Max and me jumping into Song's car ready to make guitar noises to the sounds of Planetshakers. We admired Hong Li's sunnies:

When we finally got there, Team Go went ahead and started digging a hole to China. This photo was taken only in the first 5 minutes. By the end, Kent had his own lounge seat, steps and swimming pool within the hole.

Meanwhile, some brave souls hit the waves while Girl Power aka Beach Princesses laid down the towels and slowly worked their way through all the food.

We particularly liked Jonathon's dumplings:

And I think Chuckie was having a grand old time lounging in his makeshift sand chair until this rascal came along:

Soon it escalated into this:

Then we went on a walk along the beach and I spotted these three models voguing:

And these two beach goers:

Yes that's Mikey and Sandie running away from the evil camera.

We then decided to build a sand castle.
And then a turtle.
And then a crab.
And it turned out like this:

And here's even more photos from the day. Ciao!

Two teeth less, two days later

2007-11-23T20:43:00.000+10:00

So it's been two loooong boooring days since I've had my wisdom teeth removed. My diet has consisted of chicken soup, congee, yoghurt, porridge and fruit juice. I couldn't resist having solid food again, so tonight's dinner was instant noodles. I was left with a sore jaw, but it was well worth it! Mmm...non-liquidy substances...

While I've been recuperating, I was suddenly struck with many pearls of wisdom:

Don't try to be net-savvy. I found this out when I tried tweeking my new blog template through editing the Html and was only left with destruction and despair.

The Biggest Loser was inspirational first time around, but then it's like, "Wait, what am I doing still watching this? I'm not obese. But I'm probably becoming obese just sitting on this couch...Mum, can you get me a bowl of ice-cream?"

Aim for the rug when kneeling. My knees learnt this the hard way when Mum decided to do an hour long epic prayer.

Don't overfeed the dog. Cleaning up dog vomit is not the most exciting recreational activity around.

Zef and Steffy's tea strainers really do work!

With my new blog layout, I'm loving it! It's so...aboriginal. Still under construction by the way.

Meanwhile, Happy Raise Awareness about Cyrus Month!

And now you know what it's like to be me.

Musically Challenged

2007-11-19T22:38:00.000+10:00

So, I just got back from bible study (which was excellently led by B) and Bui kindly gave me Ally's old guitar. I've already started strumming!

Wrinkles is probably thinking, "Great. First I had to put up with her shower singing and now this? What did I do to deserve this Lord? Well, I know I ate the very last avocado from the tree, but I couldn't help myself! It was just hanging there like some glorious edible emerald sent from doggy heaven! Anyway, where was I? Oh yeah, licking my bum."

Anyway, where was I? Oh yeah, the guitar. Well, I don't know about you, but I think this calls for a GUITAR MONTAGE! Neat-o!

Now that that's out of the way...it's the holidays! I'm so excited, so many things to do and see! Bec coming back, rellies coming, Christmas, back to uni...wait, what?

Oh yeah, you heard right. I have to do summer courses while Girl Power + ATan get to go to Sydney. But it's all good! I'll make my own fun, like laughing at the cows in Logan. And then hopefully they won't kill me with methane.

And I'm also going to try a little thing known as, "blog more". That's one of my New Year's resolutions...except starting earlier. I think it's just nice to jot down memories of one of the most exciting times of the year, THE BIRTH OF CHRIST! Or better known as McHappy Jesus Day!

Mmm...beef patties.

I guess that's all for now. Goodnight San Diego!

It's been scientifically proven! Not.

2007-11-09T10:56:00.000+10:00

MUM

What's wrong?

Aargh. I'm having really bad period pain.

MUM

Ah yes. I get that as well.

Yeah. Runs in the family. Thanks Mum.

MUM

Take it as a good thing! It means you'll have healthy babies.

No it doesn't!

MUM

I had healthy babies.

Well, I mean Becky was a bit on the fat side so it took a few hours of

painful pushing, but all things considered...

Gross.

Downdate!

2007-10-17T12:12:00.000+10:00

I realised what I'm about to write is probably not worthy to be called an 'update' so I've named it the opposite :)

So what's been happening? Oh yeah, Zef & Steffy's wedding. Snore.

Jokes! It's just that I'm not a very good recapper, so I'll just highlight a few of my favourite moments from Saturday:

- Vonnie, Heidi, Fanny and myself looked like lost sailors out at sea as we attempted to usher. My pathetic attempt consisted of,

Me: So, um...can you guys like um, move into the church now?
Anti-usher guests: glare.
Me: Or whenever you're ready, yeah, I mean its not like there's a wedding to start. Oh okay, I'll leave now.

I realised Vonnie was the best usher: "Good morning, how are you today? That's great! Could you please move through the side doors on your left as the bride will be arriving soon."

One uncle obviously thought we were in dire need of help as he came up to me and said, "Here's an idea. You should stand in the shape of a triangle, two on each side, not all over the place like you're doing now. Sigh. Back in the old days, ushers were good."

But yes, his expertise did help a little. All in all, it was a good learning experience!

- Vonnie catching the bridal bouquet. We all keep teasing her that she pushed Ally out of the way. Seems like Jacey's wind direction test with her finger didn't work very well!

- We all recieved a heart-shaped tea strainer from Zef and Steffy at the reception, and I knew Mum was very keen on them as she kept exclaiming how much she loved them, so much that we ended up with 3 back at home.

It was a very "humourous" wedding with all the dancing, oysters, and having 1 Kent and 3 Song's on our table.
I've put up photos up on Facebook if anyone wants to take a squiz.

Busy week ahead, pink ribbon selling, puppet showing and (sigh) studying.
Laters! Ness.

Mooncake Festival told by Bec

2007-09-28T22:35:00.000+10:00

Wow! These holidays have been as CRA-ZEE! as Hooch that I forgot to do a recap on Mooncake Festival, more fondly known as Mid-Autumn because its contradictory name to the season is just so hilarious.

I was talking to Bec on the phone the other night and I was excitedly planning to spend one hour or more telling her all about Mooncake '07.

I was like, "Wanna hear about Mooncake this year? It was really awesome, first the..."

This was her response:

"I know. Without you even telling me, I know. I know what happens! I can even predict the order of which the performances are performed in. Now. Let me tell you how Mooncake 'o7 went...

First Uncle Leo and Aunty Carrie came up on stage as MCs, and on the wall behind is a really extravagant backdrop done by the YAG.

Then they sang a song. Or two. Uncle Leo made a joke here and there, Aunty Carrie frowns at her husband here and there.

Then the Women's Fellowship comes up on stage in co-ordinating outfits and does a dance.

Then the Sunday School sings a song, and then Solo Gratia play a song. Then..."

And this is when I jump in, "But wait! It was better then that! Frank and Col did this awesome ninja fight..."

"Hey. Who's recapping Mooncake? You or me? Now where was I? Oh yeah. Then YAG gets up and does a song and/or dance where the men do something humorous with props.

Right about now, Uncle Leo gets up and chucks chocolates at people who can answer questions. Then JMYF does some wierd, but imaginative performance.

Then MYF does a play or song."

"We did both this year!"

"Whatever."

"And then did three Uncles get up and play their harmonicas? No? What happened? Uncle Kiong blew up some balloons and made them into poodles? Oh, well that's different.
Okay sis, gottagonowbye!"

So there you have it. A recap told by someone who wasn't even there.

Off to have my three minute shower. Laters!

GIRL POWER!

Right Hand, Left Hand, Shoulder Pop, Jump!

2007-09-20T18:37:00.000+10:00

Seems like everyone's on blogging hiatus...except me!
I've been Youtube surfing (as you do when you're studying) and came across a funny clip, it's the famous Roxbury sketch from Saturday Night Live starring Jim Carrey, Will Ferrell...and some other dude.

And this is how guys spend their Saturday nights...

And this is without a doubt one of my favourite JD fantasies:

Oof. Need to stop typing. My arms hurt from lifting dumbells.
Still don't know why I put myself through the pain.
Kinda felt like watching Australian Idol on Sunday all over again. Eek, those performances were baaaaad.
Kinda like the furry banana I just ate.

Aaanyway, what was I about to do? Oh yeah, stop typing.

Blog 31+4: The Mobile Chronicles

2007-09-04T22:05:00.000+10:00

Er, this is just a bit late, but better now then never huh?!

So I was looking though all this junk on my bookshelf and came across an adaptor for the memory card in my mobile. The card is about the size of my pinky nail and fits into what looks like an SD card. I was wondering how I get stuff on my laptop! But now I know, so here's a few funny pics I've taken over the past year. Memories...

Hmm, this isn't church. Must be Tea Etc. Bighead and Mr. Guai Loh pulling their best "come hither" faces.

I don't know why I find this photo funny, maybe cause it looks like Frank's dislocated her shoulder.

These are the Chinese 'fireworks' Team Viv made for Chinese New Year. The term 'fireworks' is debatable, some think they look more like red cigars or cheerios. I personally wouldn't mind if they really were cheerios. Apart from the 'Jump Jump Jump' dance, it was the best thing there that night!

Hahaha! This is Frank trying to look excited at being in the children's section of the library with me. Yeah, that was a random day.

You can't really see it properly, but if the photo was bigger, you'll be able to see Sven's 'Holy Socks". This is at bible study, the era in which Pen was still an unmarried man and B wasn't wearing his SOHO grey hoodie.

Wow. Frank would have looked really pretty except for THAT. But at least we've learnt something from this - Frank has teeth.

Me unaware that I'm about to get my head eaten off.

Remember boys, she's available and ready to get married!

Emily's in quite an unfortunate position. But maybe not, as it looks like she's really enjoying being licked!

Camera phones are the best invention ever!

This is one of the few hundred photos I took of ducks during our scenic walk at Family Camp. We tried feeding them grass, sticks, fingers and car keys. They were. Unamused.

Everyone wants to look like Zef these days! Col and Frank wearing Zef's signature sunnies bought by Jon.

And this is what happens at Plaza. Jon making a hand puppet out of his glasses case. Can his hand even breathe in there?!

Expect much more photos in this blog now that I know how to work my camera phone!

Blog 29: "Studying"

2007-08-29T19:16:00.000+10:00

So I haven't updated in a while because I'm busy and wouldn't have time to be able to write anything that lives up to this blog's high standards. *cough cough*

I realised this when in last week's workshop quiz, I read the following question...

Draw the structures of the ionisation of the following amino acid side chains: Arg, Ser, Phe, Gln, His and Cys.

and thought, "Oh fuddle duck, I have absolutely no knowledge in this matter".

And then I thought, "Oh well, at least I have psychology to fall back on."
That was until I saw the following question...

What theory of altruism, ethical hedonism or aversive-arousal reduction model, is to do with relieving negative feelings connected to empathy?

And though, "Altruism? Hedonism? Hedon. Edon. Eden. In the garden of eden ba-beh!"

So yes, I've concluded I should be studying. And have better concentration too.
But I'll be back for the big finale, the supposed blog 31!

Blog 22: The Rules of Sneekies

2007-08-22T17:39:00.000+10:00

So my 30 blogs in 31 days have totally gone down the drain. I've been studying and what not for the past week, but I'm back! With the long awaited 'Rules of Sneekies'.

The other person besides me who may be slightly interested in this is Zef. And he won't see it because he actually has a life now that Steffy's bounced back into Aus.

SNEEKIES: THE WORLD'S GREATEST GAME

Background Information

For many years, the Eight Mile Plains Chinese Methodist Church Methodist Youth Fellowship have met every Monday night for what they call..."Bible Study". Shocking, I know.
When the meeting is over, it was everyone's favourite part of the night...Refreshment Time! But it was also time for something else. A game. A sneeky game.
Zef, one of the founding fathers coined this growing tradition "Sneekies". Quite an appropiate name for a game which requires the player to be patient, strategic, have quick reflexes, and above all else, stealth.

History (2007-07)

A member of the EMP CMC MYF called Fanny Dong had very unusual habits. One of them was to gain someone's attention by caressing their arm accompanied by a very long "heyyyyyyyyyyyy..." Not only was this invasion of personal space frightening, it gave one the feeling of immense awkardness. Fanny is somehow immune to this as she continues this habit to this day.
Vanessa Tay, another MYF member, described one particular incident, where Fanny Dong's hand caressing was so slow, it slid all the way down to Vanessa's elbow. She thought, "surely I am not the only one who gets this painfully awkward feeling" so she tested it out on Anna one bible study. The shudder and slight wailing of Anna told Vanessa one thing. VICTORY. She had found a weapon. A weapon of MASS AWKWARDNESS.

Zef had found this action quite intriguing. And so Sneekies begun. Many rules and strategies have developed, which are described in more detail below.

Rules

The giver's hand must make direct contact with the reciever's elbow or knee.
The hand must make a definite caressing motion.
The reciever of the Sneekie must be unaware of it until it is too late. In other words, the giver must do it when the reciever isn't looking.

Point system

Elbow from the back= 1 point
Elbow from the front= 2 points
Double elbows= double points
Knee= 1 point
Double knees= 3 points

Strategies

Guard your elbows and knees with your life.
Be patient. Wait for the right moment, otherwise the reciever will be more on guard then ever.
For easy points, it has been found that the best way to get an elbow from the back is when the reciever is busy reaching for food. As the arm becomes unguarded...CARESS! Victory is yours.
Another one is when the reciever is deep in conversation with someone. Any number of points is possible here.
Referring to strategy 2, it is probably best for the reciever to talk to no one and roll up in a little paranoid ball in the corner.
Always be on the lookout. One incident (which Vanessa is very depressed about) is when she took her eyes off Zef for a split second, and CARESS! He had taken advantage of that moment and got a front on elbow.
A highly skilled strategy is for the giver to make sure the reciever sees them in the corner of their eyes. This makes the reciever think that they can't possibly be Sneeked upon. The giver then slowly steps backwards until they are in the reciever's blind spot. Then they make a quick dash or dive towards the target. This one takes skill and time my friends.

So there you have it. Sneekies. No equipment or expensive things needed. Just two quick hands and a sucker willing to play.

Until next time, good luck everyone with their upcoming exams!

Blog 16: The Coochi Island Adventures

2007-08-16T15:25:00.000+10:00

Technology is very frustrating. I tried to upload photos yesterday to my laptop and it didn't work. It had morphed into a screaming toddler - "I WON'T DO IT! YOU CAN'T MAKE MEEEE!"

So I shut the whole thing down and wouldn't touch it. But I'm back! And it's working! So here's blog 16!

(If you've noticed, I'm naming blogs by the date, not the number of blogs I've actually written. That's to make myself feel better when I get to number 30. Back to the story...)

Yesterday, we went to COOCHI ISLAND! I've been tricked by the weather before so I decided to go all out and bring half my closet so that I was prepared for any weather, desert storm or hurricane!

Frank brought along the family camp hula hoops, which was a great source of fun as you will soon read.

Girl Power (minus Max, plus Sven) went into Kent's car. Bui deliberately went into a separate car. We got there and boarded the barge. Notice the man in the truck who's a bit frazzled by the sudden onslaught of asians.

Tim was so excited he wet his pants.

I felt like we were a boat full of illegal immigrants on our way to the Australian shore.

We did a lot of walking (in a circle) trying to find a good place to have lunch. We finally settled for a spot with a table, BBQ place and logs to sit on. The only problem was that two old ladies were sitting there. So in true Asian style, we kicked them off by dumping our bags on the bench and glaring at them.

I soon found a great photo op while having lunch. No one else was quite as enthusiastic.

A great rendition of 'If I was a Butterfly' soon burst forth. You know how it goes -

"If I was a butterfly, I'll thank you Lord for giving me wings.
And if I were a robin in a tree, I'll thank you Lord that I could sing."

And then Song comes in with -"And if I were a washing machine..."

We were all like, "what??!! It has to be an animal, not a random object!"

Sharon, Heidi and I soon took it upon ourselves to make soup and rice cakes, I mean clean the pan.

Hulan hooping action soon broke forth and many new techniques were formed. The favourite of the day was Mikey's "Windy Palm" or "Wildgrass". This is where he would wildly flap his arms above his head. The funny thing is that it actually worked.

We then went fishing. I caught nothing. Kent worked his magic and caught a few. Frank was really good at it, and caught a whole family of small ones.
Sven decided to roll his pants up into short shorts for no apparent reason.

Check out my Facebook for more glorious photos like the one above!

Friday night: the August birthday extravaganza.

Blog 14: Fernwood, Fernwood...

2007-08-14T22:53:00.000+10:00

Just got back from FERNWOOD! The friendly neighbourhood women's fitness centre.
I went with Max and Viv. Was soooo much fun!

We got there at 5 and joined the BODY COMBAT class. Or what I like to call it, the I'm-so-unfit class. Seriously, my arm nearly died after just two air punches.

Then we went on the treadmills and cycling machines for about 40 mins and then did some stretching. All to the sounds of Fergie's glamorous. Can never get enough of that song, can you?

And to finish off, we went into the Detox Box (was like a not so hot sauna) for 20 mins where we talked about blackheads, excema marks, toning and other girly things. Seriously, when 3 girls get together, we can talk our heads off till they explode.

Then we went to Sunnybank Oriental to have dinner + milk teas and a gossip. I mean, chatter. *shifty eyes*

All in all, it was a really good night where we all just really enjoyed being together. We've made plans for an all girls day at the beach where we can get a tan and as Viv put it, "not look like I'm going to church" =)

Coochi Island tomorrow! Oh yeahhh...

Blog 13: Make Us a Bungalow

2007-08-13T22:37:00.000+10:00

Family Camp 2007 evaluation: 10/10

As some may have noticed, I haven't blogged for 3 days, because I was at Family Camp!!

edit: make that 4 days. Yesterday, my computer was down again, so I'm putting up the post this morn.

Even though there was no net at Camp, it wasn't like we were out in the wilderness or anything. I mean there was a projector, sound system, bed sheets and a bowling alley down the road, so I definitely wouldn't call it real camping!

So here's a breakdown -

Penandkarin came to pick me up round 7pm with Bui and Sandie bouncing around at the back. I joined their bouncing in the middle seat. The bouncing soon died down as we went along, put to sleep with Karin's mix of "acid jazz". At least I was half entertained unlike the other two because I could see the music player screen with Penandkarin pictures smiling back at me. Ah, newlyweds.

Sandie and I also entertained ourselves talking about nursing labs ("Today, we will all be stripping down and walking around naked!") and how Bui drools in his sleep (jokes :D)

We got there and joined into praise and worship. Sandie and I found out we were with Frank in a cabin (B21!) and got real excited. Pen found out he was with Simon and Sven. Not so excited.

Food was really good there as well. Eggs, sausages and hashbrowns for brekkie, the best cookies I've ever tasted for snacks, kebabs for lunch and meat and veggies for dinner. Oh yeah, trifle and cheesecake for dessert. Mmm...slobber...

The speaker was really good. He was given 1 1/2 hours and I was like nooooo...i can't last that long! but he was so good i stayed awake throughout all of it!

During our free time we had 5 options:

- volleyball championships
- footy championships
- cricket championships
- nature walk
- walk along the beach

Just the word 'championships' scared us girls, so we went for the beach option. Ems, Karin, Tim, B, Zef and I (Frank and Viv were 'studying') took a walk along the beach trying to find alive things. All we found were crab balls. And I just realised that sounded really bad. I mean sand balls.

We then went in search for ice-cream, and then went for a VERY long walk around a pond, or as we like to call it, 'the duck detention centre'.

As there weren't many sightseeing sights, I decided that what I could see will have to make do. Sadly, I accidently deleted all the photos off my camera so I can't show any of them. I love technology.

But basically I took photos of construction, the path, tadpoles and 'do not feed the ducks' signs. I'm sure everyone is disappointed about not being able to see the pics.

Games was also really good. Many ideas which the Youth Camp can steal...

And now for some funny moments/quotes:

Frank and me: Welcome to our lair! I'm an 8th level ogre magii with invisibility, and this is Randall!

Frank: There's no cups left. I wish there was an endless supply of cups.
Ems: If you wish for an endless supply of cups, you'll regret it.
silence.
Frank: I wish for an endless supply of cups.

Mary J Blige: mmm, mmmmm. Get out of my way Bono. Woahhhh, oh oh oh.

Everyone's hula hooping techniques -
The sky diver (Andy Lou)
The foot pedal (me)
The standing still (Viv)
The crazy hip spinning (Fong)
The backwards and forwards thrusting motion (Zef)
The no technique (Uncle Albert)
The Elvis Presley (Chloe)
The look at meeeeee! (Most of the little kids)

Me: I've got flour all over my face! (from a game)
Zef: Must run in the family.

Connect camp '06: Bec aka Flour face

Tim changed the words to the camp theme song. The original version is:

Make me a blessing, make me a blessing,
Out of my life, may Jesus shine.
Make me a blessing, oh Saviour I pray,
Make me a blessing, to someone today.

The new and improved version is:

Make me a bungalow, make me a bungalow,
To some bum today, may bungalow shine.
Make me a bungalow, to some bum today,
Make me a bungalow, to some bum today.

Hmm...not so creative though.

Going to Fernwood tonight with Max and Viv. This will be interesting...

Blog 9: Bus Adventures

2007-08-09T19:01:00.000+10:00

Blog 8 doesn't exist because the internet was down last night. But I guess it doesn't matter as most of you don't care going by your comments.

So only a quick story today:

Today I got onto the bus as usual. We rumbled along until I heard this huge whip, crash.
Before I could go "What was that?" there was another whip, crash.
I looked up to see what it was. Seemed like the bus was nearly mounting the curb because we hit about another 10 trees growing along side the road before the bus driver noticed and violently swerved off.
The people at the QEII stop looked highly alarmed as we pulled up as they must have seen the whole thing.
The bus driver opened the door and stared down at them expectantly, The people looked quite relieved as the 120 pulled up behind us, and they all jostled quickly towards it.

Sigh. Public transport. Nothing like it.

Family Camp's this weekend, so won't be here for a few days.
And probably won't make up for it either.
Be back on Mon! Yea! Happy camping.

Hmm...better go pack.

The Epic Blog (consisting of blog 5,6 & 7)

2007-08-07T17:25:00.000+10:00

Wow. My blogging efforts have got about as much encouragement as the dam levels in Queensland.
And I don't blame you. My last blog wasn't even in the right Mastercard ad structure (as Mikey so kindly pointed out). But I've been very busy, specifically, creating a 20 page story for Frank's bday present. So that's my pathetic excuse.

But to make up for it, I'm going to post up a very large blog, so large in fact that hopefully no one will be bothered to read it and I can slip in a few textbook extracts here and there.

By varying the experimental conditions, Milgram discovered several factors that influence obedience. One is the proximity of the victim to the participant. Obedience declined substantially if the victim was in the room with the participant, if a voice replaced pounding on the wall and if the participant had to force the victim's hand onto a shock plate to administer further punishments (see figure 18.8). Proximity to the experimenter also affected the decision to obey. The closer the participant was to the experimenter, the more difficult was disobedience; when the experimenter sat in another room, obedience dropped sharply. More recent research implicates personality variables such as authoritarianism and hostility that can influence the likelihood of obedience as well (Blass, 1991, 2000) Conversely, gender had little effect on obedience in Milgram's studies - women were as likely to comply with the experimenter as were men.

There's one right there if you didn't notice. That's from my Psychology textbook, which to my surprise is quite an interesting read. We're learning about social psychology right now and how much others and influence our behaviour, attitudes, values etc. And this is from every end of the scale mind you. From persuader techniques of telemarketers to the Nazis.

Boring uni update: tick.

Last night was bible study, led by Max! Was very good. Discussion was on an all time high, special guest Carson always had worthy comments, and Emily appeared and disappeared under her hood throughout the night.

B just looked murky under his hood.
And I just realised I described B as looking murky, like a swamp. What's a better word...broody?
My English vocabulary astounds me.

Cousin update: tick!

Throughout Sunday night and Monday, I thought I had lost my mobile. Obviously this boring bit of my life calls for a bit of spicing up in the form of a short story.

DETECTIVE NESS AND THE LOST MOBILE

Beep beep. Beep beep. Beep beep.
Detective Ness sleepily opened her eyes. She looked at the time. No wait, she had to put on her glasses first. Let's start that again.

Beep beep. Beep beep. Beep beep.
Detective Ness sleepily opened her eyes. She put on her glasses and looked at the time. 8:30am. She pondered on whether to get up. Her dog Wrinkles happily trotted into her room and licked her face. No choice now. Ness had to get up unless she wanted to smell like dog saliva all day. Once she washed her face, changed and had breakfast, she packed her unnecessarily extra large bag. Keys. Purse. Bible. Blistex. Tissues. Scarf. Extra jacket. Fluro bouncy ball. Mobile.
Time to go!

After church service, Ness put her bag on the seat outside the kitchen so she could start kitchen duty. She told Tim she didn't want to wash or rinse today. He asked why. She replied, "Because I don't want to get my hands wet." Tim was not amused. For the next 20 minutes, Ness had fun bouncing her bouncy ball over every hard surface there was. The bench, sink, door, and Tim's forehead. Soon it was time to go. She grabbed her bag which had fallen over and jumped into the car.

Ness and her mum went to Pho Phang for lunch. Her mum kept telling her it's not actually called Pho Phang, but they neither knew the real name so the argument died pretty quickly. Like every Sunday lunch, they both pulled out their mobiles for some lazy Sunday texting. Well, at least her mum did.

Ness looked into her bag. Oh crap.

They arrived home in peace. Ness had decided not to tell her mum just yet. She thought, "Time to put on the detective gear". She dressed herself in detective gear, but only in her mind because she didn't actually own any detective gear. Not even a magnifying glass. But she did have a notebook! She decided to make a list of where her mobile could be:

1- Church- seat behind computer
2- Church- around seat beside kitchen
3- Market Square- lost/no hope

She thought option 2 was a safe bet so she rung RL. He said he'd look. As Ness hung up, she thought it was time to tell her Mum. The usual followed, "WHY? HOW? WHERE? WHEN? SO IRRESPONSIBLE LAH!"
Ness took refuge in the shower. As she came back out, she saw her Mum had a very smug look on her face.
"What?" asked Ness.
"Wouldn't you like to know."
"Er...well yes I would."
long pause
"I just found your mobile"
"Where?!"
"Wouldn't you like to know."
"YES! I WOULD! VERY MUCH!"
long pause
"I found it..."
"Yes..."
"In..."
"Uh huh..."
"the car."
"oh. whoops."

Case of the lost mobile? Solved.
THE END.

Worst story ever. Tick!

Blog 4

2007-08-04T17:01:00.000+10:00

Getting two plastic forks stuck together for the price of one: 15c

Bargaining a textbook down 40% its original price: $30

Getting a large Macca meal for the price of a small: $4.80

Sneaking through 3 zones on a 1 zone bus ticket: $1.20

Staying true to my Asian heritage: Priceless

Blog 3: Yeah...I know what I'm talking about

2007-08-03T22:08:00.000+10:00

Firstly, I would like to address an issue raised by the commenter Dr. Zef.

Just because blog 2 showed some interesting, highly humourous videos, doesn't mean it did not count as a blog. It had writing which not only accompanied these videos, but enhanced it.

A video by the way is just a collection of moving pictures.

And if a picture is worth a 1000 words, a video must be worth a billion times more.

I win.

Me: 1
Zef: nil.

Onto better things, today I had to fill out a survey for an honours student in Psych (to gain credit points).

Anyway, their thesis was about society's view on mentally ill patients.

It took me up to an hour to fill out this survey stating my opinions with truth and conviction (like I knew what I was talking about). At the end, the student was like,

"By the way, have you ever even come into contact with a mentally ill patient?"

Me: Ah...no.

Student: You do know your comments are totally useless then?

Me: Ah...now I do.

silence.

Me: Can I still get my credit point?

Student: silently hates me through her stare.

Hope that was to everyone's satisfaction.

Goodnight!

Blog 2: Tyra Banks is cra-zee!

2007-08-02T21:15:00.000+10:00

Goodness, nearly forgot to blog. I nearly failed without even trying!

Watched this infamous moment a few days ago. I'll set the scene:

This is America's next top model season 3, and Tiffany has just been ELIMINATED. Tyra gets a teensy bit annoyed (note: understatement) because Tiffany's not taking Tyra's mega awesome show seriously enough, but instead she's...bah, just watch it:

And this is Family Guy's take on it. Pretty accurate I say.

30 BLOGS IN 31 DAYS!

2007-08-01T17:30:00.000+10:00

It's August! Glorious August! There are many reasons to love this month:

Last month of winter!
Many birthdays to celebrate!
Halfway through Britain's NTM Season 3!
Changing to a brand new toothbrush!
August starts with a letter in my name!

To celebrate this splendid month, I'm going to post 30 blogs in 31 days.

Some of you would exclaim, "Impossible!", or "You couldn't even past 1 week!", or like most of you, "I don't even care!"

So to defy all odds, I'm going to do it. (And also because I'm going to pretty much spend all these lonely nights in front of my lonely desk. We're going to be lonely together.)

But because I realise there is a big chance I might fail, I've given myself some leeway of 30 blogs, not 31.

And also, this counts as a blog.

DISCLAIMER: The writer does not take any responsibility of anyone who comes to the realisation in the next 30 days that they have just wasted glorious August reading this worthless blog instead of doing other glorious things.

Now for the save

2007-07-27T20:20:00.000+10:00

Update: I've joined Facebook.
As I was telling Lou, I'm one step away from total nerdom.

Hmm...I've been waiting for someone to write about Soph's farewell bash, but it hasn't happened! So I'll do it, I'll take one for the team!

Max, Frank, Sandie and I arrived early to help Viv cook. I warned them that I couldn't cook! but nooooo, Viv put in charge of the chicken, and look how it turned out! So unless you like your chicken raw in the middle and black on the outside, don't get me to cook meat.

I also accidently told Soph about her surprise present.

Ness: so when do you want your messages?
Soph: what messages?
Ness: you know. The ones you wanted us to write on A5 sheets so you can read it on the plane.
Soph: uhhh...
Ness: oh crap.

I found out later it was actually Steph who had organised it.

Actually, I left early so can't tell everything, but apparently there was an epic prayer at the end.

But while I was still there, Viv requested that we share some stories about Soph. All the stories seemed to be ones that didn't exactly make Soph glow inside and well up with emotion, but as long as the person saved it by telling something good about her, or how they'd miss her, it would be allllll good.

For example:

Zef: Soph was such a brat when she was younger.
Everyone: quick, save it!
Zef: uhh, but now she's a young lay-de! ("lady" but to the tune of that lady song. Yeah, you know what I'm talking about.)

And another eg.:

Me: Yeah, Soph was one of those kids at the back of Sunday School being a rebel...um, but now she's a mature lay-de! And...I'll miss you! Phew!

Kent didn't seem to get the concept though-

Kent: For the dance at her first camp, she was partnered with me, but she didn't want to. So I decided to propose to her, because I thought it would be fun to tease her.
Soph pouts.
Everyone: Quick Kent! Save it!
Kent: She was such a brat, nothing's changed...
Everyone: try again Kent...
Kent: (pause) And one day Soph, you'll know why it's fun to tease children.

Ah, good save Kent, good save.

Back to Uni Blues

2007-07-20T19:56:00.000+10:00

Sigh. Going back to uni on monday.

My subjects look half interesting:

- Biological Chemistry
- Human Physiology
- Molecular Genetics
- Structural Biochemistry
- Intro to Individual & Social Psychology

I reckon I would look forward to going back if I did subjects like:

- How to poison a tissue
- What's the appeal of Supre?
- Paperclips and other interesting stationary
- What a subway sandwich looks like as a milkshake
- Jellyfish wrestling

Well, to mark the end of the holidays, here's a recap of the holidays. How many times can I say holidays?

Mum, Bec and I do a big shopping expedition to the far away islands of Carindale, Pacific Fair and Garden City. I buy two pairs of shoes!
One blue! The colour of a summer sky.
One gold! The colour of gold.

Went to dinner with friends. Tina drove us to this 'scenic' spot where you can see the nightlife of Logan. Obviously we sat in the dark for about an hour. Then drove past Macca's to pick up chicks. And by chicks, I mean frozen cokes.

Camp prep. Consisted of glueing things, buying things, typing things, printing things...all done to the yells and screeches of Mary J. Blige and Bono put on repeat.

Back to uni. Waaaaay to soon. The 'intensive' lab was not so intensive, if prep beforehand was done. Otherwise you're left standing there scratching your head wondering what to do with the tubes of DNA and lysozyme. Had a test, which I thankfully passed.
And went to the city a bit to play pool, which sometimes I'm good at, and other times I'm crap. Which pretty much means I'm crap.

Got gastro. Yea! Rolled around in bed for a day lamenting to Bec that I was dying and made her feed me biscuits and diluted cordial. Had to walk to the doctor's to get a medical certificate for missing a lab. The doctor told me I had dry skin. I was thinking, "is he now going to try and sell me moisturiser? Cause I already use sorbelene. But I haven't used it lately cause I have GASTRO. SO GIVE ME A BREAK AND GIMME SOME PILLS."

Missed camp. :( That was a HUGE bummer. But had fun laughing at the camp video and hearing Bui's cryptic clues for the amazing race. You can sit on it like a chair, but I wouldn't do it bare. Apparently the answer was a log and everyone was confused on why you wouldn't sit on it bare and Bui was like, 'because you would get splinters on your bum'. BAHAHA.

Bec and I went to see Blades of Glory. She got exasperated with me because I decided I wanted to carry spaghetti into the movies.

Bec: Who carries spaghetti into the movies?
Me: Who doesn't?
Bec: Everyone!
pause.
Me: Yeah. On second thoughts, spaghetti wasn't such a good idea, was it.

Oh well, I happily slurped through my dinner and no one was worse off.

Watched a bit of Top Model here and there. What annoys me is when they pick the finalists, and then eliminate them not because they're not good, but because they weren't tall enough in the first place anyway. What the?! Why pick them at all then? Poor (thin) girls.

And then watched a bit of Pirate Master here and there. It's exactly like Survivor...but on a ship. On a ship! ON A SHIP!! (dies of excitement) Yeah, I'm a sucker for these cheesy reality shows. Everyone always asks, "but, what's it's appeal?" Um, hello? It's on a ship. ON A SHIP!!

Went to Thil's 18th at JoJos.

To the left are the ex-Griffithers Kate (now at UQ) and Thil herself who's now in Tassie and grown an extra head.

Went to Joy's 18th at Garuva's. That was really fun. Got to catch up with people that I haven't seen since school. It was so dark that I missed my mouth a couple of times trying to eat my pumpkin fritters (which I kept calling fritatatas for some reason). I think the dim/non-existent lights were supposed to be atmospheric but who knows? Maybe the waiters had really ugly faces and didn't want people to see them.

Went to see Transformers. Was sooooo good. But I dunno. I reckon they could have come up with better names then "Bumblebee" and "bone crusher". I could bore you with names I think the writers could have used, but I'll spare you.
Okay, I'll give you one. "THE FUN MACHINE".
Mimi called me a grub cause I spilled Subway sauce all down my top. Luckily I had a scarf to cover up my mess.

Then went to see Harry Potter with some youthers. Twas okay. Had to go to the toilet during the middle which I've never had to do before. I ran out of the cinema, down the stairs and passed a cinema guy who looked at me strangely. I shouted at him "I'm bustinggggg". That was me trailing off as I ran into the toilets. As I ran out, he shouted at me "You didn't have to tell me that".

And just got back from the city with some school friends. We went from coffee shop to coffee shop for some strange reason. We first had lunch at the coffee club. Then went and had coffee and another coffee club. Then went and had frappes at Starbucks. And I didn't have to go to the toilet once! (Chest swells up with pride)

Off to watch Top Model. Toodle loo!

Hello Blogspot, This is Me!

2007-07-15T18:38:00.000+10:00

If you didn't know, which most people won't, the inspiration for the title came from the Saddle Club.

Damn. You know your blog just plummeted straight into the Crap Bin as soon as the Saddle Club was mentioned. Hmm..off to a bad start. Not to worry! A top five list of the best inventions ever invented (or yet to be invented) should save this blog!

This here list is a commemoration to my nearly two years on msn spaces. May I never experience its slow loading speed and inability to upload photos again.

5. The Dream Cotton Bud

Consists of a stick with cotton ends which change colours to entertain the inside of your ears while you clean them. A disadvantage is that your ears may get so excited that they explode.

STATUS: yet to be invented
USEFULNESS: -1/10

4. Word Snatcher

Snatchers words right back into your mouth!

STATUS: yet to be invented
USEFULNESS: 7/10 (loses a few points because APPARENTLY it's not possible to invent. Pfft. Whatever.)

3. Persuader Machine & Black Thingy

These machines can be used to brainwash people so you get your way every time. Totally harmless.

STATUS: yet to be invented/may never be invented
USEFULNESS: 9.99999999/10

2. Boards which stuff can be written on and then erased

Pretty self explanatory

STATUS: sigh. Unfortuntely, something called the whiteboard has already been invented.
USEFULESS: very.

1. The Clever Club

An exclusive club, only for clever people. Membership cannot be bought. But it can be bribed with lollies. Each member gets a badge and a special 'clever' pat on the back.

STATUS: up and running. if there was something faster than running, it would be doing that.
USEFULNESS: greater than infinity/10

So there you have it. If you have invention ideas, don't be afraid to share it with the world! Zef thinks socks with laces would be a marketable hit. Yeah, right.

Too bad I've already copyrighted them and "La-socks" are already in production! Mwah ha ha

Okay, off to last camp committee meeting.

I've only got one thing left to say: CAPTURE THE DREAM!